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Monday, January 23, 2012

Football Casualty

Q: My boyfriend is all into football and his favorite team lost today. Now he's all pissy. This has happened the past two years now. When his team badly, he's impossible to live with until they win again. He has even hit me once or twice when I've tried to talk him out of his mood. It's like this every fall—the rest of the year he's fine. What should I do?

Anne: Do you actually live with him? Because if so, maybe you should vacate the premises for the autumn. If not, call a hiatus for football season—maybe he'll get the hint that he's not fun to be around when he's acting juvenile.

Dee: Punt his ass down the field of broken relationships. Any man that raises his hand to a woman is an asshole. When he does it because his football game lost makes him a fucking asshole. And I don't care how great he is during the rest of the year. No need to try to make a pass or rush for a touchdown. He'll drop the ball every time. Call a foul and toss him out of the game.