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Sunday, August 1, 2010

Growing Up Fast

Q: Please tell me what I should tell my mom. I say I'm only young once. I want to date and be on my own like my friends who are also fourteen. Some of my friends have even had sex already. My mom says I have to tell her where I'm going, with who and when I'll be back. She treats me like a child. I think I should be treated like an adult. How may I convince her?

Anne: You might convince her by doing better in English—you made two errors in your short note to us. (See if you can find them.)

A fourteen year old is not an adult, unless you're from a tribe in a 3rd world backwater, where they are often married and expected to raise families or support a family. In which case, you'll be working too hard to go on dates or have fun on your own. The parents of your friends who let them date and do God knows what else are doing their children no favors. Someday you will thank your lucky stars you had such a caring and strict mother.

Dee: What should you say to your mother? Yes, ma'am. Whatever you say, Mom.

Take it to the bank, kid, you are not ready to take on adult responsibility. No fourteen year old is, especially for sex. One small mistake in this arena can cost you dearly for the next 22 years of your life. Any one of your friends who say they are able to handle sexual intercourse and all the other crap you mentioned is lying or stupid or both.

Enjoy your time as a teen by not taking on adult behaviors and activities you aren't prepared for. And if you think Anne and I are just taking your mother's side of things, ask yourself if maybe we don't know a few things you don't. Maybe—just maybe—age teaches us a few things you haven't had time to learn.