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Monday, February 27, 2012

Wifely Education

Q: My wife is in college—again. This is the third time she's attempted to get an undergraduate degree. The first two times she didn't get beyond the second semester of the second year. That's about when she burns out, decides she doesn't want to do what she's in school for, and drops out. Within a few years, she's back at it. This is her third attempt and her third major area of study. She isn't working to help pay for this crap and I'm having to support the household and take care of two kids because she's "studying." That also means there's no time for sex. I'm sick of this, but don't know what to do about it.

Anne: It's admirable for someone to want to go back to school, but I think she needs some guidance. Have her see her school counselor and take an aptitude test of some sort. That might direct her to specific course of study where she is really passionate and can succeed. Once she does succeed, you may find you were happy she went back for her degree. College graduates make more money than non-graduates, so she'll be better able to contribute to the household finances.

Dee: She must have had time to do something besides school—you knocked her up twice at least. So unless you plan to keep her barefoot and pregnant in an effort to keep her out of college, it sounds as though the two of you should sit down and form a plan. If she's too scattered in what she likes to develop a plan for success in school, help her do it. Obviously she wants a degree or she wouldn't keep at it. So help her find a way to do it right. It sounds as though you're giving her support. Maybe grudgingly, but you're giving it. Make sure the support you give pays off. Be a man and not such a whiner. Help your wife be all she can be, and maybe she'll help you by getting on her knees once in awhile in gratitude.