Appreciating Each and Every Minute

Q: Last week, when coming out of the grocery store, I stopped to help an elderly man lift his groceries in the trunk of his car. He started talking and I couldn't help but listen as he explained that his wife of 48 years had recently died. He said he hadn't been the best of husband's but that came home to him when going through his wife's things. Back in the closet he found a box. Inside, a dress was neatly folded. He didn't remember the dress, he said, or even the date written on a yellowed sheet of paper laying on top. "December 20, 1959. I wore this dress to the Sanford Christmas part and David said I looked beautiful." With tears shimmering in his eyes, he told me he didn't remember telling his wife that she was beautiful. In fact, he was sure he hadn't paid her enough loving attention for most of their marriage, and now he regretted that every day. I can't get the man out of my mind. I've tried to think of the last time my husband told me I was beautiful or when I last complimented him. How can I get it across that our time on Earth is finite, and we should appreciate every second with the ones we love?

Anne: What a touching and beautiful story. Of course, you can always tell him you love him, but what about finding new ways to say it? Cook or bake something he loves once a week. Tuck notes in his lunch that let him know you're thinking of him. Plan a day to do whatever he wants—even if it's nothing, or watching a ballgame on TV. Hold his hand. Smile. Flirt. I hope whatever you do works.

Dee: Well, of course I also thought of doing things he likes but my mind ran in a different direction. Fix a dinner he likes—and include an aphrodisiac, like oysters or chocolate. Plan an evening out to somewhere he wants to go—and let him know you're not wearing panties. Hold his hand—and when you're in a private spot (or semi-private?), place it over your breast. Or put your hand over his cock beneath the drape of a tablecloth. Give him a blowjob when he's least expecting it. Buy something new and special at Adam and Eve, or if you're able, plan a weekend to a Sybaris resort. Telling him that you should appreciate your time together is always more special with a little fucking to frost the cake. Have fun getting your message across!

Boobs or Booby Prize?

Q: I don't know whether to be insulted or elated. After a long, dry spell, I finally have a boyfriend. We've dated for a couple of months and the sex is great. Or at least, I think it is. For me it has been. I've always known I wasn't Mary Big Boobs, but I thought my girls were attractive enough. Until last week said boyfriend offered to pay for the surgery if I'd get them increased by 2-3 inches. He says he's a breast man and he just doesn't get all that turned on with me looking the way I do. Funny, I thought he was turned on. Now I don't know if I should take the money and run, or just run.

Anne: Run. Any man who has been making love and then can make such a comment doesn't deserve you. If he isn't excited by who you are, find someone who is. Plus, there's a huge risk to you if something goes wrong.

Dee: This isn't about making love, it's about fucking, and half of that is fantasy. The surgical risks aside—and they are considerable, so be sure you do your homework—how do you feel about having larger breasts? Would they make you pleased with your reflection or self-conscious?

Assuming you wouldn't be unhappy with a bigger bra size, and assuming you are willing to find a really good surgeon with a track record of success (you're not paying, remember), and assuming all payments are made up front (no pun intended), then I say go for it. After all, relationships come and go, but 38Ds last forever.

Who's the Biggest Boob of All?

Q: My boyfriend says he loves me but he likes large breasts. He wants me to get a boob job. I checked and they're very expensive. He's not working so he can't pay, and I just barely have enough in savings to cover the costs. I really love him, but I'm nervous about this. Any advice?

Anne: My advice is to tell him exactly what you just told us. He doesn't have the money and neither do you (and you don't, really). You never said how you feel about this kind of surgery. Is this something you'd be willing to do, or be happy to do? If you go ahead, make sure you use a reputable surgeon. This is time to go for quality and not a low price. But I'd advise against. If your boyfriend says big breasts prove you love him, find someone else, someone who loves you as you are.

Dee: This is a big duh. He thinks boobs make the woman? Check. He can't or won't pay for the operation? Check. He doesn't mind if you empty your savings account of your hard earned money? Check. You have concerns that he doesn't seem to care about? Check.

This guy is a big, fat LOSER??? CHECK.

Dump this asshole and find someone who wants you as you are. Or maybe as you are in a Wonder Bra.